The Power of Words

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.  That’s what we were taught when I was growing up.  The truth is that words are far more powerful than the simple nursery rhyme would have had us believe as children. Words have the ability to break a person’s spirit and impact the way the way she view’s herself.  But words can also be used heal and empower us to believe we can be the best version of our self.

Take a moment to consider two seemly simple words that are often used to describe a person’s journey: suffering vs. struggling. On the surface it may not be obvious to recognize the difference but there is an important distinction between the two.  When we use the word “suffering” it indicates that the person is a willing participant.  That he has accepted his fate in life and has given up hope that things can or will improve. But what if we simply flip the script and describe his plight as “struggling” instead.  Now it shows that he is actively looking for a way to improve his situation. For a way to overcome the obstacles life has thrown in his path.

This seemingly simple distinction can make a world of difference in the way we view our lives. Often times I hear people use the word “suffering” when they refer to someone living with a mental illness. But I am here today to tell you that I do NOT suffer because of the various diagnoses I have given over the course of my life.  There are days when I may struggle more than others, but I do not let that stop me from continuing to live me my life. And it is within the struggle that I have found an inner strength that keeps me pushing forward and working to overcome the challenges we all face at one point or another in our lives.

I cannot change what has happened and the truth is if I had the opportunity to change my past I wouldn’t. Everything that has happened has helped shape me into the person I am today. Our past shapes our perspective and if we embrace that, we can use the hard stuff to remember how it made us feel when we’re interacting with others. We can then be more compassionate and avoid inflicting a similar pain upon others that was bestowed upon us. So, while I cannot change my past, I can share my story with the goal of preventing someone else from having to share a similar story.

The important difference between suffering and struggling is hope.  That intangible spark that helps people make it through the rough times.  It is when we realize that change is possible, and we shift from a place of suffering to accepting the struggle, that we grow and find that we can achieve greatness. And in remembering our own journey we can help others to learn and understand that while change is not easy it is possible. It is as simple as changing the words we use, focusing on building one another up, working create a world of inclusion where we celebrate the diversity of others instead of reacting out of fear of our differences and tearing one another down.