Making the Shift

Over the years I’ve gotten better at ignoring “The Beast” but occasionally it still likes to come out and taunt me. Especially when I’m struggling with one thing or another and find myself in a dark space fighting just to make it through the day.  I’m come to expect its presence during these rough patches and while it’s tough fighting it’s voice but thankfully I’ve learned ways to cope with it.  

What’s frustrating is that there are times when “The Beast” creeps it’s way in when things are going well and is disguised as an overwhelming sense of self-doubt.  The danger being that it starts off subtly and if I’m not careful it can quickly lead to a massive downward spiral into the darkness. The trick is being able to recognize it and then there are a couple of different coping strategies I’ve learned throughout the years to help push past the negative thoughts.  

Here are a couple of the techniques/coping skills I use when I’m struggling with self-doubt, negative self-talk, etc.:

·     Start a gratitude journal.

It’s actually a pretty simple idea but can seem a little difficult at first.  The idea is to simply create a list of the things your thankful for in your life.  The key with it is not to turn it into something you “have to” but instead as a way to acknowledge the good things in your life even when it’s not always to see.  A couple of years ago I turned it into a photo project and there were a few days when I wasn’t feeling up to it and gave myself a break when I needed to.  It was a great way to focus on the positive side of things instead of letting myself get bogged down by the darkness.

·     Catch it. Check it. Change it.

There are a variety of different techniques/names for this exercise, but the basic idea is to learn how to stop the negative self-talk in the moment.  It’s takes practice but as you become more comfortable with the skill it makes a significant difference and can help prevent the downward spiral.  The first step is to “Catch” the negative thought, if possible in the moment.  Then you “Check” the thought against the facts to determine whether it’s real or your perception of the situation.  Once you’ve determined that the negative thought doesn’t match the facts you “Change” it by removing the perceived thoughts to a more “realistic” view. 

 For example, earlier today I found myself stressed about a workshop I will be presenting later this week.  I started to worry that I wasn’t really qualified and fearful that the people in attendance wouldn’t accept me and see me as a fraud.  I was able to “Catch” the thought and “Checked” against the facts I know about the situation.  I submitted a proposal and it was accepted.  I have presented this workshop to smaller groups in preparation for this event and have received positive feedback. And based on the facts of the situation I was able to “Change” it and create a plan to ensure I will be adequately prepared to present when the time comes.  As a result, even though I’m still nervous about it I know that I will be ok.  And it has helped shift my mindset to a positive outlook.